


A Day in the Zoo, A Night in the Hospital

by holdyourbreathfornow



Category: A Heist With Markiplier, Who Killed Markiplier? - Fandom, markiplier - Fandom
Genre: Eric calls Bim Dad, Fighting, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Violence, and it all goes downhill from there
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-26
Updated: 2019-11-26
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:28:32
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,440
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21575293
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holdyourbreathfornow/pseuds/holdyourbreathfornow
Summary: Eric loves working at the zoo...Except for when he has to deal with assholes.
Relationships: Eric Derekson & Everyone
Comments: 4
Kudos: 90





	A Day in the Zoo, A Night in the Hospital

“Okay, here we are!” Bim parked the car in the visitor’s lot of the zoo and looked over to Eric, who was pinning his nametag on in the visor mirror. Sudden fondness welled up in Bim’s throat and he had to choke it down before he could speak. “I’m proud of you, kid.”

“Wh-where did that come from?” Eric squeaked and went as red as a tomato, Bim erupting into laughter as the younger ego hid his face in his hands. “What did I do to deserve that?”

“You got a job giving tours of the zoo and shit.” Bim nudged Eric’s shoulders. “Who knows, maybe we’ll make a showman out of you yet.”

“Do… Do I have to?” Eric asked, the smile dying a little on his face and Bim cursed mentally.

“Nah, kid. You don’t have to do anything you don’t want to.” That restored Eric’s grin and he looked up at Bim with shining eyes and pressed forward into a hug. 

“Thanks, Bim.”

“Course. I’ll be making cookies, so try and get home before Host steals them all.”

“I can’t beat a mind reader!” Eric laughed as he opened the door and slipped out. Bim rolled his window down and leaned his head out.

“Have a good day, Eric!” The younger ego waved from the gates of the zoo, the ticket girl watching with amused fondness.

“I will! Love you, Dad!” With that he turned and darted in, leaving Bim, shocked by the new name, to slowly sink back into his seat.

“Dad, huh?” He brought his hand up to cup his jaw as he broke into a grin. “Yeah, I could get used to that.”

-

Eric was one of the most popular guides at the zoo. He loved the animals, obviously, and his joy was almost infectious, getting both kids and adults just as hyped as he was. The kids loved him because he acted like one of them, and the adults loved him because he was actually teaching their kids something.

Eric’s favorite part was always at the end of the day, on the last stop of the tour. There was a petting zoo right by the exit gate that the kids loved, and Eric got to hang out with some of the other guides, who all told him he did a good job, which was always nice to hear.

Today his job was just a touch more difficult.

“With these lions, the males actually watch the kids while the females go and hunt! They’re not due for a feeding anytime soon, but it does look like they’re pretty active today!” One of the lionesses paced close to the glass and Eric reached out to touch the glass where her head would be when she stopped next to him. “This lady right here is named Vanessa! She’s an adolescent, which means she’s a teenager.” At that moment, Vanessa growled and Eric laughed. “I guess that explains why she’s grumpy.”

“So the guys don’t do anything?” A man close to the back of the group asked and Eric nodded with a grin.

“That’s ri-”

“Damn, wish it was that way in real life.” Eric’s grin turned a little more brittle. 

“Sir, please watch your language. There are children present.”

“Sure, dude, whatever.” The ego sighed and started walking again, heading for the peacock exhibit. 

“Now with these peacocks, everybody thinks the females are the ones with the bright colors, and the males are the dull ones, but the reverse is actually true! Males use their colors and unique calls to get themselves a mate.” The man who had made the comment by the lions, who Eric had started keeping a closer eye on, opened his mouth again and Eric fought down a flinch.

“Wow, is every female a lazy ass no matter the species?” Several women in the group growled in almost frightening unison and Eric frowned.

“Sir, if you keep making disruptive remarks like that, I’m going to have you escorted from the zoo.”

“Shut the hell up, dude.” The man ignored him and Eric sighed. He shook his head dismissively and grinned at the smaller kids. 

“Alright, kiddos, last stop! Does anyone know what that is?”

“Petting zoo!” One cheered and Eric applauded. 

“Sure is! Remember to stay with your parents, the animals will still be there no matter how long you take!” Eric watched as a shy-looking little boy latched onto the disruptive man’s sleeve. So he had a kid. Unfortunate. 

Eric unlatched the petting zoo gate and kids and adults alike flooded inside, paying for food to feed the animals crowding around their legs.

The rude man didn’t buy any food, instead playing on his phone as his kid started petting a sheep, talking to it excitedly. The kid must’ve pulled on the sheep’s fur too hard, because it bleated in pain and pulled away slightly from the kid, who looked startled.

Eric darted over and kneeled down next to the kid, who had pulled his hand away from the sheep.

“Hi there. My name’s Eric.”

“J-jamie.” He stammered and Eric smiled. 

“Hi, Jamie. Do you want me to show you how to pet the sheep?”

“Yes, please. I didn’t mean to hurt it.”

“Animals always seem to know when you hurt them on accident.” Already the sheep was butting at Jamie’s stomach again and Eric laughed. “Look, I think he’s saying he forgives you!”

“Cool.” Jamie pet the sheep with stars in his eyes and Eric stood back up. He glanced around and startled to find Jamie’s dad staring at him, hatred blatant on his face. 

“C-can I help you, sir?”

“I need to talk with you.” The man practically snarled and stalked out of the petting zoo, Eric confusedly following behind. The other guides spread their hands inquisitively to him and all he could do was shrug his shoulders in response. 

The dad stopped next to the water fountain and turned to face Eric.

“I don’t remember giving you fucking permission to talk to my kid.”

“I don’t remember n-needing permission.” Eric squared his shoulders and didn’t flinch when the dad took a threatening step towards him. “Listen, I wanted to make sure none of the animals hurt your kid since you weren’t paying attention.”

“Are you calling me a shitty dad?” The man snarled again and if Eric looked hard enough, he could almost see Derek’s face layering over this asshole’s face. 

“You know what? No. But I am calling you a rude man who has no respect for women, which leaves me wondering what kind of woman was stupid enough to sleep with an arrogant dick like yourself.”

Jesus Christ, that was the rudest thing he’d ever said. Ed was going to be so proud.

“How dare you?” The dad looked shocked, but it quickly turned angry and he lashed out, gripping Eric’s wrist so tightly the skin started turning white.

“L-let me go!” Eric tried to tug away and the man got even closer to him, one hand still holding onto his wrist while the other grabbed the collar of his shirt and lifted him off his feet.

“You pretentious little shitheel, just think you’re better than me cause you got yourself a job, is that it?”

Behind the man, the other guides and a couple of security guards were running towards him, but the man was already moving again, slamming Eric to the ground.

Or at least, that was what the man meant to do. 

They had been arguing next to the fountain, which was made of stone and sharp edges. 

The back of Eric’s head slammed onto the edge of the fountain and stars exploded behind his eyes. He could feel the skin rip and tear, blood pouring forth as he crumpled onto his side. 

The security guards tackled the man as the other guides ran to Eric. One, Georgie, looked vaguely green. Johnny, another guide, turned to Georgie.

“Call 911. We’re moving him to the medical office.” As Eric’s vision started going black, he couldn’t help but think one thing.

He really wanted to go home.

-

The assorted egos burst through the front door of the hospital, to find Dr. Iplier waiting for them by the front desk. Host was the first to Dr. Iplier, who tutted over the Host’s blood-stained bandages.

“Where is he?” Bim asked, shedding glitter everywhere with how hard he was shaking. King had their hands laced together, but he looked just as upset and worried as Bim.

“We moved him to a room.” Dr. Iplier spoke calmly, trying to soothe everyone’s frazzled nerves.

“How is he? No fuckin’... Irreparable amnesia or anything?” Bim stiffened slightly more at that, and Dr. Iplier sighed while glaring at Ed.

“No, he is absolutely fine. He woke up pretty soon after we finished stitching him up, and he has to stay awake for awhile since he got a concussion.” 

“Now, we need to ask the question that’s been on everyone’s minds.” Dark pushed forward, looking the calmest out of everyone there, though he was given away by his ringing aura. “What happened?”

“According to the cops, Eric was attacked by one of the people in his tour group after the man grew angry about Eric talking to his kid. The guy’s currently in police custody-” Wil teleported away before reappearing at his husband’s side, and Dr. Iplier sighed. “Though I have a feeling now he’s in the manor.”

“Sure is!” Wil chirped, his eyes maniacally bright. Dark smiled and laced their hands together. “Figured it’d be a nice little bonding experience for us when we got home.”

“Can we please go see him now?” Bing asked. His and Google’s cores had been humming loudly ever since they stepped foot into the hospital and now the younger android kept fidgeting anxiously.

“Yeah. But be quiet, if you make him upset, I will absolutely kick you out. Ed, Bim, and King can go in first, and I’ll let the rest of you figure it out in the hall.”

Dr. Iplier led them up to the fourth floor, where he sat everyone except the three he’d named in a waiting area, then led those three to Eric’s room. Peeking inside, the quartet saw that Eric was awake, though he looked very out of it. His glasses were resting on the bedside table and his head was swaddled in thick bandages. An IV was taped to the back of his hand and he stared out at the treetops below his window. 

Bim was the first to move, claiming the seat at Eric’s bedside.

“Hey, kid, how you feeling?” As soon as he’d begun speaking, Eric had turned his head to face Bim, the younger ego’s face splitting into a smile.

“Hi, Bim! I’m okay.”

“Those bandages on your forehead beg to differ.” Ed walked into the room, King trailing after him. Bim glared at Ed, but Eric just laughed softly. 

“Yeah, I guess it’s been a rough kinda day.”

“Everyone’s waiting outside to say hi to you.” 

“I’m tired.”

“I know, kid, I know.” Ed sat on the end of the bed and tugged Eric forward into a hug. “Listen, you don’t have to say hi to everyone, but Bing and Google got real worried about you. Leave it to the robots to have the most emotions, huh?” Eric snorted and Ed grinned triumphantly at making his kid laugh. “I’ll make a deal with you. You say hi to Bing and Google, they’ll take the others home, and the three of us will stay here until you can come home too. Sound good?”

“Mm-hmm.” Eric nodded and King left to bring in Bing and Google. 

“Seems like everyone’s winding up in the hospital lately.” Bing joked as soon as he walked through the door and Google smacked his arm. “Whaaaat, I’m trying to make the kid laugh!”

“I think tact is more important than humor in this situation.” Google told Bing, who scrunched up his face, but nodded.

“I thought it was funny.” Eric tried to assure Bing as the android settled on the end of the bed opposite to Ed.

“You always think my jokes are funny. But how are you feeling?”

“Tired. It sucks that I can’t sleep.”

“Yeah, I know. But, hey. We got something for you, but we’re not sure how much you wanna hear about it.”

“Why do I have the feeling it’s about the guy who hurt me?” Bing winked and tapped the end of his nose before gently tapping Eric’s. 

“Do you want us to kill him?” Google asked, as straightforward and blunt as always.

“He’s got a kid.” Eric sighed and Google lifted one eyebrow.

“He has several charges of child abuse and his wife is filing for custody. She is employed and not yet re-married, though there are pictures of her, the child, and the new girlfriend having fun.”

“Oh.” Eric sank back against his pillow and King winced sympathetically. “Okay.”

“You don’t have to decide right now-” King tried to interject but Eric sat back up suddenly.

“I don’t want you to kill him. But I want him to remember us, remember what happens when he messes with people he shouldn’t.”

“Aw, the baby of the family’s growing up!” Bing coos and Eric bats at his hands.

“Let’s go tell the others, Bing.” Google pulls the younger android back by his shirt collar and smiles at Eric. “They’ll like his decision, I’m sure.”

“We’ll be home soon.” Bim assures them and Ed nods in agreement. The two androids nod back before standing and leaving. As soon as the door’s closed, Ed’s reaching for the TV remote.

“What’s the trashiest thing they have on cable?”

-

Ricky Monaco blinks awake to a single lightbulb illuminating a dreary concrete room. He’s surrounded on all sides by people with the same face as the jackass from the zoo, and he starts squirming at his bonds.

“Hello, Richard.” One of the egos, for that was who they were and suddenly Ricky was very afraid, spoke up. It was the main one, with the ringing and the black and white aesthetic.

“I vote we call him Dick!” One of the reporters spoke up.

“Ooh, I like that.” The killer TV host drawled and grinned as he pulled a knife out of thin air. “Whaddaya say to a little learning, Dicky boy?”

“L-learning?” The poor man stammered and all the egos laughed, in terrifying unison.

“Yes.” Dark spoke again and his face went blank as shadows loomed up like great black waves. “You’re going to learn what happens when you mess with our family.”


End file.
